Tag Archives: feminism

Microaggressions: Racism in the 21st Century


Posted on February 14, 2013 by

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(Editor’s Note – Happy Valentine’s Day! We’ll be back later this afternoon with gifts you could get your sweetheart any time of the year.)

Though blatant/explicit racism has been deemed “politically incorrect” in our society and is thus generally frowned upon, racism is deeply ingrained in our culture, and practiced (whether consciously or unconsciously) by all of us. Much of current racism/sexism/ethnocentricism now takes place via “microaggressions,” the subtle interactions that normalize the implicit hierarchal order of our society.

Microaggressive statements reiterate the dominant idea that the heterosexual, white, middle-class, capitalistic model is the universal “right way” to live and be, of which all variation is inferior (less than). Research suggests that “microaggressions” are the most harmful because they are often defended and cast off as “no big deal,” “it was a joke,” or in many instances, the person committing the microaggressive act is oblivious to its oppressive/offensive content.

Examples include: “Yeah, he’s black on the outside, but he’s white inside” (therefore suggesting being black on the inside is unacceptable); “there is only one race, the human race” (therefore failing to recognize and/or respect racial/cultural differences); “He only got into college because of affirmative action” (therefore he is not a credible student); “I’m not racist, I have black friends” (suggesting that simply befriending people of a different race cleanses you of racism); and dismissing people of color’s experiences within this racist culture (i.e. “why does he always have to bring up that he’s black, I’m white, you never hear me talking about it”).

February is Black History Month, and it is important that we look within us for our own racist/sexist/classist/ethocentrist/xenophobic tendencies. Here is an excellent video that illustrates microaggressions in action, and the harmful effects they have on those who experience them:

Most people do not consciously choose to be racist/sexist/classist/xenophobic, but have unfortunately grown up in a culture that systematically teaches it. Racism and discrimination will continue as long we keep kicking it down the road with our “politically correct” boot. Think about it. Better yet, talk about it.

Links We Love: Tuesday Edition


Posted on January 29, 2013 by

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woman_reading_newspaperHappy Tuesday, Feronians! Hopefully, it’ll be even better than your Monday.

Today, we’re sharing some awesome stories we’ve found on the internets:

And lastly, but never least: is a Disney-and-princess-free daughter a more empowered one? It’s a very good question.

Have you seen anything interesting in the news lately that you’d like to share?

Feminism and…Finance? How Women Can Take Charge of Their Financial Futures


Posted on January 28, 2013 by

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woman_moneyI’m going to fess up: one of my feminist passions is about women and finance.

Sounds boring, right? Well, it might not be when I put it to you this way: more than half of older women are so poor that they have to decide between food and medication - they cannot have both.

Why is this? Women often do not save for retirement; many women can be financially destroyed after divorce; and like it or not, more women leave the workforce to take care of their children and/or parents than men do. Add to that the still-present wage gap between men and women and it adds up to record numbers of women living in poverty.

(Seriously, read some of those links: the statistics are horrifying.)

What can you do to make sure this doesn’t happen to you? What can you do to make sure this doesn’t happen to your mother? What can you do to make sure that this doesn’t happen to your daughter? Well, here’s a few tips that I’ve learned in my research on this topic (please note: I am not a financial advisor, but I am passionate about the topic; some financial jargon ahead, so if you don’t know a word, look it up here):

    • Please, please, please – save for retirement.

We’re in no way wading into the politics of this topic, but by and large, pensions are gone: if you or your parents are lucky enough to have one, please realize how lucky you are! Most of us have 401(k)s or 403(b)s with our jobs; use them! Contribute as much as you can to your retirement plan, but if your company matches your contribution with some money of their own, take advantage of it. (For example: if they “match 3%,” you need to contribute at least 3% to receive it. Magically, your 3% contribution becomes 6%. It is nearly-free money.)

Some advisors recommend contributing 15% of your income to your retirement – I would say just contribute as much as you can, even if it’s 3%. Why? It’s the magic of compound growth – you (hopefully) gain 8% or so on your investments over the year. It doesn’t matter much in the early years, but boy, does it matter in the later ones. 8% growth on $5,000? Your account gains $400 just for existing. However, 8% growth on $225,000? Your account gains $18,000 – just for existing.

Do it. Do it today.

    • Married? Awesome. Hope for the best; plan for the worst.

We all hope that we will get married and stay with our spouse forever, am I correct? I hope that too for everyone, but unfortunately, this doesn’t always happen. (By the way? It’s single women who are most at risk for falling into poverty.)

So, consider maintaining your own separate savings account during your marriage, if you’re comfortable with it. It’s also a good idea to always maintain a credit card in your own name only, as it can sometimes be difficult to obtain one during or even after a divorce. (Stay at home parents? This goes tenfold for you.) Also, it’s always a good idea to know what you and your spouse own jointly and what your spouse owns on their own.

However, if you’re actively considering divorce? Set up your own savings account now. There are a lot of expenses associated with divorce, least of which would be hiring a lawyer. (This article is a great resource to look at – just in case.)

A quick note: same-sex marriage and divorces are an area of law that is just now being created, so it’s very, very important that you consult a lawyer if you would be going through this.

    • If you’re able, make sure you’re adequately insured.

Insurance is expensive – believe me, I know. What’s “adequately insured?” Well, it depends on what you can afford.

The ones you have to have? Health insurance. (We’ll be talking about this in depth all year on the Feronia Project – look out for the posts!) Disability insurance. (Have enough income to live on if you could never work again? No? Get disability insurance.) Renter’s/homeowner’s insurance. (Could you afford to buy everything in your house again if it burned down? No? Get insurance.)

Three other ones to consider, if you’re in the situation:

  1. Life insurance – term life insurance is usually your best bet. Do you have kids? A spouse that depends on your income? Time to buy life insurance. No, it’s not fun to think about your own death, but it can help to know that the ones you care about will be OK.
  2. Long-term care insurance. Can you afford to put your parents in a nursing home for the rest of their lives and still be able to do everything you want? No? Think about buying this - with an inflation rider, as this type of care will only become more expensive. (If your parents are under 70, ask them if they’ll consider purchasing the policy. If the monthly payment is too high for them, consider paying for half of it.)
  3. Auto insurance. If you drive, get this one. I’ll share a personal story: last January, I got into what I thought was a small fender bender (not my fault, thankfully). Unfortunately, this small fender bender destroyed  my suspension and was more expensive to fix than the value of the car. It was a total write-off; I was shocked. However, with the payment from the insurance company and a payment from my emergency fund, I was able to upgrade to a much newer and more affordable car. Happy, happy day.
  • A controversial one: your savings come first; your child’s come second.

I know, this is a tough one, but it’s a better idea to save for your retirement than for your child’s college education. Think about it this way: your child can get scholarships. There are no scholarships for retirement.

  • Lastly, educate yourself.*

There’s this horrible stereotype that women don’t know anything about finances. Well, I think it’s time to change that. I’ve done my fair share of reading on the topic; here’s the ones I liked the most:

What do you think? Is it time women took control of their finances – and their futures?

(Some of the above content includes affiliate links.)

40 Years After Roe: A New Conversation About Abortion


Posted on January 22, 2013 by

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This month marks the 40th anniversary of Roe v. Wade, the Supreme Court decision that allowed women to obtain safe and legal abortions in all 50 states. Over the years many legislators have attempted to both overturn or create massive restriction to the law, in an attempt to make abortions illegal. This is still happening today, as you can see with the “Personhood” movement that has been strategically combing the country trying to pass legislation that would define “life” as beginning at conception, thus allowing making illegal contraceptives like the IUC, Plan B, medical procedures like in-vitro fertilization, and of course, all abortion care (even in the case of rape or incest). For many of us, we cannot remember a time in our lives when access to safe and legal abortion did not exist. While most counties in the country do not have abortion providers, with some orchestrated effort, many women find a way to travel to an abortion provider when they need their services.

We tend to think that abortion is a new procedure, since the famous Roe v. Wade decision was the groundbreaking law within the 20th century. But did you realize that abortion has been a procedure that women have been having for hundreds of years? In fact, the first anti-abortion laws were created to protect women from obtaining unsafe abortions, protecting them from unskilled physicians in 1821. It was not until 1873 that the Comstock law was passed, making the disbursement of information about contraception and abortion illegal. Did you get that? The Comstock laws made even talking about abortion and contraception illegal. Imagine that!

roe-v-wade

So, 140 years after the Comstock laws banned women from learning about contraceptives and abortions, we are still having the same battle of politicizing the womb. Women still account for less than 20% of all politicians in our government. Those who make the laws are not the ones who suffer the ramifications, we see this over and over.

It is time for a new conversation to rise from the ashes of the polarized, dogmatic issue of “pro choice” or “pro life.” These are outdated modalities for talking about abortion, and completely dismiss the emotional, social, financial, and practical complexities of women’s experiences with abortion. One in three women within the U.S. will have had at least one abortion by age 45. These women are your family members, your colleagues, your friends, your neighbors, your socially networked communities. Every decision stems from a set of individual circumstances as unique as the woman herself. Abortion is not just an emotional buzzword. Abortion is medical procedure that one in three women will experience in her lifetime, and the perpetuation of the stigma does not reduce rates, only goes to ostracize, dehumanize and polarize us emotionally and intellectually. It’s time we have another discussion, it’s time we respect the women of our communities, and support legislation that allows for greater access to effective and affordable contraceptives that prevent unintended pregnancies (half of all pregnancies in the U.S. are currently unintended).

In the spirit of this new discussion, Planned Parenthood Federation of America (PPFA) has launched a new campaign called Not in Her Shoes that reminds us that abortion is not a black and white issue, but a complex decision that many women are faced to make. See the new campaign video below. We’re Planned Parenthood. We Care. No Matter What.

Deodorant and Breast Cancer: Does a Link Exist?


Posted on January 16, 2013 by

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body odorMany of us have heard about the supposed link between aluminum deodorants and antiperspirants and breast cancer. While studies have continued to show mixed results in their findings, one should consider what has been documented. The National Cancer Institute published an article outlining its stance on the matter:

 

Aluminum-based compounds are used as the active ingredient in antiperspirants. These compounds form a temporary plug within the sweat duct that stops the flow of sweat to the skin’s surface. Some research suggests that aluminum-based compounds, which are applied frequently and left on the skin near the breast, may be absorbed by the skin and cause estrogen-like (hormonal) effects (3). Because estrogen has the ability to promote the growth of breast cancer cells, some scientists have suggested that the aluminum-based compounds in antiperspirants may contribute to the development of breast cancer (3).

Some research has focused on parabens, which are preservatives used in some deodorants and antiperspirants that have been shown to mimic the activity of estrogen in the body’s cells (4). Although parabens are used in many cosmetic, food, and pharmaceutical products, according to the FDA, most major brands of deodorants and antiperspirants in the United States do not currently contain parabens. Consumers can look at the ingredient label to determine if a deodorant or antiperspirant contains parabens. Parabens are usually easy to identify by name, such as methylparaben, propylparaben, butylparaben, or benzylparaben. The National Library of Medicine’s Household Products Database also has information about the ingredients used in most major brands of deodorants and antiperspirants.

The belief that parabens build up in breast tissue was supported by a 2004 study, which found parabens in 18 of 20 samples of tissue from human breast tumors (5). However, this study did not prove that parabens cause breast tumors (4). The authors of this study did not analyze healthy breast tissue or tissues from other areas of the body and did not demonstrate that parabens are found only in cancerous breast tissue (5). Furthermore, this research did not identify the source of the parabens and cannot establish that the buildup of parabens is due to the use of deodorants or antiperspirants.

More research is needed to specifically examine whether the use of deodorants or antiperspirants can cause the buildup of parabens and aluminum-based compounds in breast tissue. Additional research is also necessary to determine whether these chemicals can either alter the DNA in some cells or cause other breast cell changes that may lead to the development of breast cancer…*

*see original article for citations

While it is clear that further research needs to be conducted on the matter, many people would prefer to avoid deodorants with said chemicals. So, in a society that discriminates against people based on their looks and hygiene, how do we avoid smelling bad without the traditional deodorizers? Well, natural remedies exist:

Tom’s of Maine

Aubrey Organics

Miessence Certified Organic’s

And for the ultra-organic, simply try using a lime under your pits!

And of course, one can choose to abstain from masking their natural scent all together. I propose a hefty dose of kudos to those who go au natural, for despite the stigma of body odor, it is completely healthy and a natural expression of the human body.

We’re all concerned with eradicating breast cancer, and our continued dedication to scientific medical research and prevention education will surely take us there.

2013: Debunking the Beauty Myth


Posted on January 10, 2013 by

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As the new year begins, many people head to the gym with goals of shedding pounds and being the beautiful, thin person they’ve always imagined. Many think, this year, this year I will lose the weight and I will be beautiful!. Many find themselves over-exercising, starving/restricting their food intake, or taking diet pills like Phentermine (known to cause heart problems and addiction) while staring into photoshopped images in fashion magazines. While the pressures and demands on us to be uber thin and thus “beautiful” do have real, harmful effects on us in our realities; many of us try to increase our self-esteem by getting caught in perpetual loops of self-defeat and failure, which actually can make us feel worse about ourselves. Have you ever lost ten pounds and then re-gained it shortly after? How did you feel about yourself when you lost it? How did you feel about yourself when you gained it back? For many of us, we can feel worse about ourselves after the yoyo weight loss than before we lost any weight at all.

I am a strong advocate of health and wellness. This does not translate to thinness or manufactured beauty. In this new year, I challenge you to look within and contemplate your motivations for weight loss. Are you comparing yourself to people thinner or “more beautiful” than yourself? When did you start feeling inferior about the way you look? When do you feel best about the way you look? When do you feel worst?

For many, dieting and low self-esteem begin in early childhood. Dove produced a campaign for “real beauty” (though I might argue they too perpetuate the beauty myth to an extent by advertising gendered beauty products, but that is for a later post) that explored self-esteem, weight, and the beauty myth. Below I am attaching a video they created that interviews several young women about their self-esteem and the pressures to be attractive. I find the video to be heartbreaking. I can relate with their insecurities, and the cruelty endured by peers for not being “attractive enough.”

In 2013, I encourage you to turn off your televisions. Install ad-blocking software on your internet browser. Emotionally detach yourself from pop culture. Stop looking at beauty and gossip magazines. Stop consuming advertisements that tell your subconscious that you are not enough.

In 2013, let your goal be to fall in love with yourself. As is, right here, right now.

Be bold. Be healthy. Be yourself. You are beautiful. You are enough.

 

“Don’t Be That Guy”: Ad Campaign Gets Consent Right


Posted on December 18, 2012 by

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Most anti-rape discussion frames the rape prevention as the victim’s responsibility. We’ve all heard that we’re not supposed to walk alone at night, not drink too much, don’t wear this or that, etc. It’s long been a feminist complaint that rape prevention needs to be taught to the potential perpetrators. Teaching the necessity of consent, and for that matter, what consent is, is an important step in stopping sexual assault. One recent campaign does a great job representing this: Don’t Be That Guy. Canadian organization Battered Women’s Support Services is using these ads to spread their “The Violence Stops Here” message. It makes it clear that “sex without consent = sexual assault”, and even has ads that make it clear men can be rape victims, too.

The campaign conveys the belief that consent is an active thing that must be continually given, not merely the absence of a no. “Enthusiastic consent” is a term many feminists use to describe what proper consent looks like. As in, if you are with a person who says things like “I’m not sure,” is hesitant, disengaged, or seems too inebriated to make their wishes clear, you have not adequately obtained consent and should stop. Once enthusiastic consent becomes the standard for sexual activity, it is no longer possible to dismiss rape of women who were drunk, who didn’t fight back hard enough (by someone’s standards), or any other thing society often uses to dismiss sexual assault. Most importantly, enthusiastic consent places the responsibility on us all to obtain consent, not on our partners to say no enough times or in the right way.

Because sexual assault has been framed for so long in our society as something that the victim is responsible for, it’s going to take more than one campaign to change the standard of consent. But this campaign is an excellent start.

The Other Walk of Shame: From the Pregnancy Test Aisle to the Check-Out Counter


Posted on December 12, 2012 by

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Recently a patient told me that she had waited a couple of extra weeks to confirm she was pregnant because she was too embarrassed to purchase a pregnancy test from a store where the clerk might size her up. I felt compassion for her, since I’ve had my share of run-ins with mean mugging at the register.

If you’ve had an unintended pregnancy scare, you likely can relate to the hyper-vigilant nature of securing the test, the adrenaline of peeing on the stick, and your booming heartbeat in your head as the timer ticks down so casually… one line or two… one line or two…

So last week I was with a friend who was in said position. She was late on her period, had been feeling very moody, and feared the big plus sign. It was early on a Sunday morning, and Planned Parenthood was closed, so we decided to head to our local pharmacy. After weaving through the brightly lit aisles, we finally came to the wall of pregnancy tests. Deciding which one to choose was daunting task enough, (check out E.G. Hanna’s post on how to choose a pregnancy test for help with that!) but since she had me with her, I tried to muster up enough medical sense to choose an appropriate set of sticks. I was shocked at the sticker price of many of these… $30? Again, Planned Parenthood for the win, at $10 testing!!

So after selecting the test, she asked me if I would take it to the counter and purchase it since she was overwhelmed by nerves and didn’t think she could make it through the encounter. Of course, sisterhood is forever!

She walked to the car and I walked up to the register. A man who appeared to be in his early 20’s stood there as I approached, and as I placed the cardboard box of anxiety on the counter, he literally said “ooooooooh, damn!” and chuckled. A wave of rage coursed through my veins; I was shocked! The complete lack of empathy and awareness that this dude was exhibiting made me sick. I felt ashamed for my purchase, like I needed to justify my situation to this stranger; it was not the weight of my entire future sitting on my shoulders, just my dearest friend’s who was cowering in the parking lot, terrified. I wasn’t the one who’d had unprotected sex, I was really responsible, I promise, blah blah blah, justify justify justify, shame, humiliation, embarrassment…. Evoked. Really, Dude? Really?!

Impulsively, I snapped my attention right to educating this guy about the lack of tact he was exhibiting, and how inappropriate it was given the situation. I told him what he had done was incredibly rude and insensitive. He responded with a certain shock and shame of his own; he began apologizing and saying he was “just kidding.” I told him it really wasn’t a joking matter. I told him that half of all pregnancies are unplanned, and that many people who are purchasing these types of tests are incredibly stressed and anxious, and by drawing public scrutiny to a very private matter, he was unnecessarily humiliating me. He dropped his cool vibe and got real with me. He told me he was sorry, and that his girlfriend had an unintended pregnancy and that they now have a kid together. He got “real” about how tense and stressful the whole situation was. He apologized for his remarks.

TEACHABLE MOMENT TAUGHT!

I thanked him, took the bag, and headed back to the parking lot. I spared my friend the details of the check out, as she had narrowly dodged the humiliation bullet and was stressed enough. We went back to her apartment, she peed, I talked her down, and then we found the results to be “negative.” Her period eventually came a few days later, and we praised that menstrual flow.

So, friends, the real deal is that people who work in stores that sell pregnancy tests are not formally trained in the art of tact and sensitivity regarding these issues. If you have a similar experience, I hope you will have the gusto to make it a teachable moment, but I understand if the redness of your cheeks won’t allow it. Might I then suggest another option? Planned Parenthood!

Yes, Planned Parenthood offers low cost pregnancy tests, and will administer them with sensitivity, professionalism, and confidentiality. We will provide you with informational resources if you are pregnant, and can discuss better family planning strategies with you if you’re not.

Gift Guide: Your 20s-30s Feminist Friends Going Through A Life Change


Posted on December 11, 2012 by

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The 20s and 30s period of your life are full of big changes. It’s the time you get that great job you’ve always wanted; buy a nice home; consider (and maybe find) the one; even settle down and (perhaps) decide to have children.

So, what do you get that person for the holidays? Well, here’s some suggestions.

Starting a New Job / Settling into a New Home

A Great Art Print

I love this Surrealist classic, ‘The Treachery of Images‘ by Rene Magritte.

(8×12) Rene Magritte Le Trahison des Images 1929 Pipe Art Print Poster

Personalized Note Cards

Who doesn’t love a handwritten note? At Silhouette Blue, you can order personalized notecards for your friends and get them with or without a return address. (Full disclosure: I’ve gotten several sets from them and all are amazing and beautiful.)

Silhouette Blue Notecard

Image copyright Silhouette Blue.

Awesome Reusable Bag

Who doesn’t need one of these? No matter if you’re going to the gym or going to the grocery store, you’ll be in style – and helping the environment. I’m a big fan of Flip and Tumble bags, myself.

Flip and Tumble bag

Flip & Tumble 24-7 Bag, Eggplant/Slate

Plush Organs

Ok, so maybe you can’t display this at work (unless you work where I do), but all are adorable.

Ovary Plush

Ovary Plush – I Heart Guts

Words Cubed

Make poetry at your kitchen table or at your desk. It’s really a blast – and the things you can come up with…

Words Cubed

Words Cubed

A Ridiculous Pencil Set

Who wouldn’t get a chuckle when they see a reference to an ambi-turner?

Zoolander Pencil Set

Image copyright oneupdesigns

Smart Women Finish Rich, by David Bach

I’m passionate about women and finance – not enough women are financially-savvy, to their detriment. (I’m sure you’ll see a post about it…someday.) In the meantime, consider giving this book to your friend – male or female – to encourage their knowledge and, well, freedom.

Smart Women Finish Rich

Smart Women Finish Rich: 9 Steps to Achieving Financial Security and Funding Your Dreams (Revised Edition)

Might Have Met the One / They’re Going to Get Hitched

Tabletopics

I am obsessed with Tabletopics. They’re conversation starters that you can use with your beloved or anyone else – and they will take you into some places (and some topics) you never would have thought of.

Tabletopics

TableTopics Original

Guide to Getting It On

Here at Planned Parenthood of Southwest & Central Florida, we’re big fans of the Guide to Getting It On. Even if you think you know all the tips & tricks…you don’t. I promise.

Guide to Getting It On

Guide to Getting It On! A Book About the Wonders of Sex

Sexy Truth or Dare

This game is focused on what your partner likes about you - which is a great thing. (Do we need to know the wildest thing your partner did before they met you? I certainly don’t.)

Sexy Truth or Dare

Sexy Truth or Dare: Pick-A-Stick

36 Hours – Weekends by the New York Times

Ideas for every couple to sneak away to some place near them for a weekend – and enjoy. (Doesn’t hurt that the book itself is gorgeous.)

The New York Times: 36 Hours in USA and Canada

The New York Times 36 Hours: 150 Weekends in the USA & Canada

Marriage, a History, by Stephanie Coontz

Feronians, you’re a smart bunch. You probably know that marriage has been largely a financial transaction throughout history – but how did we throw it over for love? Coontz, a historian on the family and marriage, writes a compelling book on how love conquered marriage.

Marriage, a History, by Stephanie Coontz

Marriage, a History: How Love Conquered Marriage

Learnvest Financial Plan

Lots of people choose to combine their finances with their partner’s after a period of time; the Learnvest Financial Plan gets your finances in good shape to do so. (Full disclosure: I did one it was amazing – it seriously changed my life. Hence, my crusade for female financial literacy.)

Learnvest Financial Plan

Image copyright Learnvest.com

‘I’m a Mrs’ Kit

I wrote a post last week about how I plan to change my name after getting married next year, and I fully plan to use one of these kits. (By the way – these are helpful for anyone who wants to change their name, male, female, or transitioning.) Do you really want to spend a day going from office to office on a name-change quest? I think not.

I'm a Mrs Kit

Image copyright I'm A Mrs.com

They’re Building a Family (Pregnancy or Adoption)

(I’ve never had a baby, so the fabulous Genevieve and Fosgood assisted me with this section. Thanks!)

The ‘Snoogle’ Body Pillow

Many a person has sworn that a body pillow is a must-have for pregnancy. Get your friend theirs before they even need it.

The Snoogle Body Pillow

Leachco Snoogle Total Body Pillow

A Great Footstool

Check out their decor before you get this one and maybe get a gift receipt, but feet often swell in pregnancy – and it’s a useful gift for after-baby as well, because sometimes, you just want to put your feet up.

Footstool

Growing Up Green Wood Step Stool, Natural

Darth Vader & Son

For those dads that are Star Wars fans, I give you Darth Vader and Son.

Darth Vader and Son

Darth Vader and Son (Star Wars)

Dad’s Playbook

For those dads that might be Star Wars, maybe they’re sports fans – and what’s better advice than that from the great coaches of the times?

Dad's Playbook

Dad’s Playbook: Wisdom for Fathers from the Greatest Coaches of All Time

Gift Certificate to a Massage Therapist

It doesn’t matter how the child got there, child rearing is stressful. Why don’t you consider getting a massage for Mom (and maybe even Dad too)?

Massage Envy Gift Cards

Image copyright Massage Envy. It's a chain here in Florida, but I bet you know where a good one is near you!

Everything You Never Wanted Your Kids to Know About Sex (But Were Afraid They’d Ask), by Justin Richardson

Sex, when talking to kids, can be a terrifying experience to some: we here at Planned Parenthood of Southwest & Central Florida recommend this one to parents of any age to think about what they might say when their child starts asking those dreaded questions.

Everything You Never Wanted Your Kids to Know About Sex - But Were Afraid They'd Ask

Everything You Never Wanted Your Kids to Know About Sex (But Were Afraid They’d Ask): The Secrets to Surviving Your Child’s Sexual Development from Birth to the Teens

…and the ever classic Go the F–k to Sleep

Go the F--k to Sleep

Go the F**k to Sleep

So, Feronians, have any suggestions on what you’d get your friends who have had an eventful year?

Please note: Some links in this post are affiliate links.

Feronia Gift Guide 2012


Posted on December 10, 2012 by

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It’s that time again! The Feronia Gift Guide is back to help you with stressful holiday shopping. You can still peek at last year’s gift guide, but I’ve wrangled up a few more things you and your friends will love.

Ms. magazine put out a really good list of excellent non-fiction feminist books, from Bell Hooks to Ariel Chevy, that span issues of gender, race, class, and their intersectionality. You can’t go wrong with any of them really but especially check out Audre Lord, Susan Faludi, and bell hooks.

For some more, um, recreational reading you can check out Goodvibe’s list of sexy books. Show your 50 Shades of Grey-loving friends another take on erotica.

Support some rad lady artists and make your artsy friends happy. Gingko Press just put out a book of Tiffany Bozic prints.

Charmaine Olivia is another amazing artist. Her prints sell out fast but these sticker sets are beautiful and affordable.

The mommy-minded might appreciate these Nikki McClure Mama Baby prints. They’re both gorgeous and environmentally friendly; the paper is recycled and was created using wind and alternative power.

One condoms make excellent stocking stuffers. The designs on the packaging are so cool you (almost) won’t even want to use them (but you still should).

If you’re feeling feisty check out Babeland for a great selection of sex toys and erotica. Don’t forget to pick up something for yourself.

If you want to give a meaningful gift that helps others, hook up yourself or a friend with Women for Women, an organization that allows you to help finance business training and support for women survivors of war and conflict.

Have you guys stumbled upon something awesome this year you think we should know about? Post it in the comment section.