Sexuality is the #1 topic that parents dread discussing or acknowledging with their kids. I understand and sympathize with parents who have a difficult time with the subject, but they need to take a deep breath and get over it. The health, safety, and well-being of your child or children is more important than your temporary discomfort in addressing this topic. I was recently at a large dinner party and one of the couples was talking with another couple and telling them how I helped them overcome that fear. They realized it was something they had to do because they love their children. The information could potentially help protect their two children from adult and child predators. More schools are implementing the use of anatomically correct names in their ‘Stranger Danger’ and abuse prevention programs for this very reason.
According to the National Sexual Violence Resource Center (NSVRC), teaching children anatomically correct terms, age-appropriately, promotes positive body image, self-confidence, and parent-child communication; discourages, perpetrators; and, in the event of abuse, helps children and adults navigate the disclosure and forensic interview process. Many of us are given funny names for our genitals at a very young age (i.e. Pocketbook, Taco, Va JayJay, Wiener, Johnson) and taught directly or indirectly that our “private area” should not be discussed. Some of us had very little information and a lot of misinformation growing up. This leads to adults who then feel uncomfortable and embarrassed discussing age-appropriate sexuality education with their children and perpetuate the idea that anything dealing with “down there” is shameful, dirty, or secret. It creates confusion for the child and sends a clear message that if and when they have questions or concerns, they should not go to their parents or trusted adult. I know the idea of your child one day being sexually active (or even asking challenging sexuality questions) is scary, but when it does happen, think about the answers to the following questions:
1) Don’t you want them to feel good about it and know how to protect their bodies?
2) Would you want them to get their questions answered by you or random websites on the internet, or friends?
Click here for helpful resources on how to talk to your kids about sex.
Most of us are well aware of the ever increasing problem of obesity and the difficulty of encouraging males to go for a visit to a doctor or dentist, let alone increase their amount of exercise and improve their diets. In an attempt to appeal to a male’s concern about the size, width, length and functioning of his beloved penis, a campaign in the UK to bring awareness about obesity in men has taken a unique tactic.
A privately funded study in the UK surveyed 1,000 men and found that one in three men could no longer see his penis because of his belly fat. Somehow that image was shocking to me. As a woman lacking the flexibility to do a truly beneficial self-vulva exam without the benefit of a mirror, I never considered that many men couldn’t get a good look without the assistance of a mirror either!
According to one researcher, “Men care more about maintaining their cars than their own bodies, and often only see a doctor if told to by a female partner or relative.” Read the entire article and get some tips from Dr. Sarah on encouraging a male partner or loved one to embrace a more healthy lifestyle!
Some people who have a penis feel they don’t meet “the standard” or are insecure about whether they ”measure up” to other penis owners. According to a study cited in Men’s Health magazine, BJU International found that 63% of men complained their penis did not meet the mark on the measuring stick, but none of them were smaller than normal. The numbers vary from study to study, but most penis size research findings have found their participants to be on average, between 4.5-5.5 inches when erect.
Many penis owners make a mistake by comparing their penises to others when they are flaccid (like in a locker room). This could definitely give someone a complex. Let’s clear something up. Many men who are small when flaccid grow a lot when erect (grow-ers). Those who are larger when flaccid grow less when erect (show-ers). Whether someone is a “show-er” or a “grow-er,” in the end it does not make a difference when it comes to satisfying a partner. Having a large penis does not make someone more masculine or “the man,” it just means they have larger male parts. When someone is into you, it’s not just for your genitals, it’s for the more important qualities (like your butt…just kidding).
But seriously, if someone makes you feel like you don’t meet their ideal body dimensions, you should find a new partner who thinks your body is irresistible. On the other hand, if you’re the one giving yourself a hard time then cut yourself some slack. Your male parts are perfect just the way they are so embrace them (literally or figuratively) and your partner will be drawn to your new self-confidence.