According to a study published in the Journal of Proceedings of the Royal Society B, cited in Time Magazine 2,519 mothers, mainly from the U.S. and Czech Republic, found that those who met their first child’s father while on the pill were less sexually satisfied with their men, less attracted to them and experienced greater sexual dissatisfaction over time, compared with women who weren’t taking birth control pills. The study goes on to say that women who chose their partner while on the pill were more likely to end up with partners who provided greater satisfaction in other areas of their relationship.
My question is, “Why is it so wrong to end up with Mr. Nice Guy?” Do nice guys always finish last? We know biologically that when a woman ovulates she is more drawn to a man who is good-looking and masculine because our bodies are trying to continue the species. Women are subconsciously trying to find a genetically dissimilar mate to increase the likelihood of healthy offspring. I understand that some of our hard-wired responses, like our hormones and pheromones, play an important role in determining who we are attracted to, but I find it hard to conclude that it is all based on whether a woman takes a hormonal method of birth control. When a woman is looking for a partner and not a “hookup,” she is not basing that choice solely on her hormonal response to the way he looks. She is also analyzing whether he meets her needs, some of her wants, and deemed worthy of being labeled “the whole package.” I wonder if the women in the study that ended up with the Mr. Nice Guys of the world may, like most couples after being together for a few years, need to work on spicing things up. If you need a little help in that department, click here.
When weighing the likelihood of pregnancy over the possibility of choosing a nice guy over a hot guy, I think I will take my chances. I also feel that as women we are much more complex and selective when it comes to choosing a partner, and base that selection on much more than one factor. For instance, I would not choose the same type of partner today that I would have selected when I was 21. In my opinion, our age, relationship experience, past experiences, etc. play a large role in who we select. If you, however, are concerned that your birth control method may sway your mate selection, you could opt for a non-hormonal method like condoms or Paraguard (IUD/IUC). Whoever you choose to be with, I hope they make you happy.